High Tide
by Talani Silverwolf
Summary: Like the tide rushing in on the evening, Archer suffers a near breakdown after an accident.
1. Realization

Let me start off by saying that this story was actually started about 6 months ago but I couldn't think where to go with it, I finally got some inspiration after the episode 'The seventh', but I was in the middle of 'Wind at Our Backs', and waited till I had finished that before diving back into 'High Tide' (no pun intended). It would probably help if I explained that one of my totem spirits is a dragon named Xanadu and he can be a pain in the butt some times with his comments. "I heard that you mizzard!" Xanny ~ My, aren't we touchy ~ Hmm, anyway, from time to time you might see some interaction between him and I in these notes. "NO! You can't help write it, it's MY story, besides your claws would catch in the keyboard." ~ I was only asking, sheesh! ~ *aside* ~ She gets so uppity sometimes. ~ "Hey! I'm sitting here, ya know!" ~ *SNIRK!* ~ Disclaimer - Star Trek and its affiliates aren't mine (pity that) and are the property of Paramount, they are used her for the sole purpose of entertainment only. Any resemblance to persons living or dead are purely intentional (when in doubt, go with what you know).  
  
Title - High Tide  
Author - Talani Silverwolf  
Genre - Angst/Romance  
Codes - Rating: Part 1 PG-13 for mild language, Part 2 R for graphic lyrics from the Lords of Acid , intimate situations  
Pairing(s) - Do you really have to ask? ~ They're not mind readers you know ~ "Xanny, I'm gonna throttle you if you don't stop butting in!" ~ Sor-reee! ~ A/T, "Happy?" ~ Yup! ~  
  
  
  
  
It had been almost eight days since Captain Archer was rescued from the surface of the watery world they had discovered, somehow he had managed to put the failing shuttle down on one of the tiny islands that dotted the great expanses of ocean that characterized the planet. He hadn't landed unscathed, sustaining internal injuries in the crash. Fortunately, Sub-commander T'Pol had acted quickly to immobilize him and prevented him from injuring himself further. Trip entered sick bay and was immediately intercepted by Dr. Phlox.  
"Good evening Commander, I assume you're here to check up on Captain Archer's condition?"  
The Commander nodded as he said, "Yeah, I thought maybe he might like a little company. 'Sides, we finally figured out what caused the shuttle's engine to fail."  
Phlox smiled and ushered him over to the curtained of area. As Tucker came around, he saw that Jon was awake and gave him a faint grin as he recognized who it was.  
"Damn Cap't, ya still look like hell."  
"Gee, thanks Trip. Fortunately though, according to our good doctor, the contusions should disappear in a couple of more days."  
The Commander's expression took on a thoughtful air, "Ya know, marks like those bring out the mothering side of women. Wouldn't surprise me if one of our caring crew offered to give you some private nursing."  
"Trip! I'm not going to use a bruised face to elicit any budding Florence Nightingales."  
Trip chuckled, Archer seeing that devilish gleam in his friend's as the Commander continued, "Why not? Might be good for ya. You've been working yerself awfully hard lately, and I'm not the only one who's noticed. Why just the other day Hoshi was telling me about an incident where ya just about chewed off Ensign Cutler's head over a minor little thing."  
Archer glared at his friend before replying, "It was a long day, and I hadn't slept well the night before. I apologized to her later, you can ask her if you'd like."  
Tucker threw his hands up in front of him as he took a step back. "Whoa there, down boy. I was only trying to make a point", as he continued, he leaned forward, "You need ta take some time off. Am I right Doc?"  
His eyes dared the Doctor to deny that statement. Phlox sighed as he turned his gaze to Archer. "He is right Captain, you have been extending yourself much to far recently. If you continue at this rate, you could very well work yourself into what I believe you Humans call a 'nervous breakdown'. Quite colorful that, and most accurate too."  
Captain Archer had the feeling these two had planned this, working out a reason for him to take, to him at least, a totally unnecessary leave of absence from his duties. He certainly didn't think he'd been acting unreasonable lately, although the Sub-commander might argue that. At the thought of her, his mind halted, a whirl of mixed emotions momentarily sending him into silence. Phlox noted the change in the Captain's demeanor and gave him a studious look.  
"I'm afraid I have to recommend a temporary cessation of your duties Captain. Not to worry though, it shouldn't be too long I would think, providing you follow my advice. Say, three, four weeks at the most."  
Archer exploded, "FOUR WEEKS! You've got to be kidding me! I can't afford to be away for that long!"  
"I'm afraid I must insist Captain. If not, I will be forced to make a report to Starfleet, neither of us would like that I dare say."  
Fuming, he grudgingly relented to the Doctor's professional advice, but not without a final argument. "If an emergency comes up, I would hope it overrides any medical directives."  
The Doctor gave him a good humored pat on the shoulder while saying, "I'll consider that possibility for you Captain."  
"Thank's Doc, you're all heart." Was Archer's sarcastic reply.   
Dr. Phlox was assessing his latest results for his consideration on the Captain's release when he heard someone entering quietly, by leaning precariously back on his stool he was able to make out the lithe form of Sub-commander T'Pol crossing over to his office area.  
"Over her Sub-commander."  
She paused and adjusted her trajectory towards the lab. When she halted, it was with feigned disinterest that she scanned the file he was going over.   
"When do you estimate that the Captain will be recovered enough for release Doctor?"  
At her cool enquiry, Phlox leaned back on the stool and swiveled his head enough to see her from the corner of his vision.  
"From these latest results, mmm, oh around 0800 hours I think. Any more and I'm not sure he'll stay put without more eh, drastic measures."  
She gave a slight nod, "Thank you Doctor, we just received a transmission from Starfleet requesting an update on his condition. Admiral Forrest will be pleased I'm sure."  
Turning entirely around to give her a studious look, he continued, "I'm afraid he won't be returning to duty right away, I've already told him he must rest for the next few weeks. I'm sure the Admiral will understand when he receives my report."  
With a slight incline of her head she acknowledged that bit of information and turned to leave.  
"Sub-commander, was there anything else you wanted to know while you were here?"  
With a slightly puzzled look she answered, "No Doctor, why?"  
"Nothing, it just seemed you were hesitant is all."  
Arching her brow slightly, she left sick bay.  
Phlox chuckled to himself as he finished the report to be sent to Starfleet, then checked in on his patient. He was glad to see Captain Archer was sleeping fitfully without any signs of the dreams he'd been experiencing since his return to the ship.  
  
The next morning Commander Tucker was there waiting for the Captain, beaming as his friend ambled towards him.  
"Bout time, I was beginnin' ta think ya might've decided to spend your time off with the Doc."  
Archer Grinned in return as he retorted, "If he had his way, I'm sure I would. He makes it sound like I plan to sneak onto the bridge the first chance I get!"  
Trip laughed as he escorted Jon out of sick bay, "Aw, man! Doesn't he have more faith in you then that! Maybe he should assign ya a personal nurse if he feels that way."  
The Captain made a half-hearted attempt at landing a punch on the Commander's shoulder as he grumbled, "Damned if I can see his reason for keeping me on medical leave for three whole weeks, I'm feeling almost 100%."  
"Nuh-uh, not if that's the best you can do at throwing a blow."  
Archer rounded on him, his ire obvious. "Trip, I'm not in the best of moods right now considering my outlook for the next few weeks, could you please quit with the clowning for now."  
Tucker stood there, his expression sober as he replied, "Sure Jon, no prob', didn't realize ya were so upset by it. If you get too stir crazy just give me a holler, all right?"  
They continued on in relative silence, Archer greeting the occasional crew member with a cheerful enough tone but a bit embarrassed by all the concern his recent lay-up had generated, until they reached his quarters.  
Tucker watched his friend as he flopped on the bed, a streak of fur suddenly bounded across from the other side and proceeded to clamber all over him.  
"Down Porthos!" Although the Captain used a stern tone, he had a smile as he patted the joyful hound. Trip was grinning as he said wistfully, "Dang, wish I had somebody half as eager to see me!"  
The Captain looked up at him as he contritely responded, "Sorry for getting sore at you earlier Trip, I just don't deal well with convalescing. At least with Porthos here it won't be too monotonous."  
Trip chuckled as he turned to leave, "I'll stop by later after my shift to see how you're doin', and remember, NO work. If I come back and catch you going over reports, I'll tell T'Pol!"  
Archer grabbed a pillow and flung it at the retreating back of his Chief Engineer who evaded it, laughing all the way out of the room.  
Once he was alone, the Captain sighed as he stared at the ceiling. After several minutes he sat up, then stiffly rose to make his way to the restroom. He stopped at the sink and leaned on it as he surveyed the remaining marks of his ordeal, glad that they were faded to a mottled brown. He still couldn't remember most of what happened after the shuttle struck the sand and rolled several times before finally coming to a stop on its side, hell, he'd been amazed either of them had survived it at all.  
His thoughts faltered as an involuntary shudder shook him, everything had appeared to be going smoothly until the craft hit the lower atmosphere, then all hell had broken loose. He scrubbed at his face with one hand as he vividly recalled the entire control board flickering before going dark, next thing the shuttle had started to bank hard as it lost power. His memory of the events after that were sketchy, fragmented into moments of dark and light intermingled with the calm voice of his science officer telling him stay with her.   
Shaking his head to clear his mind, he ran the water and splashed the cold liquid on his face. As he dried his face, he looked at the reflection facing him, reluctantly he had to agree with Phlox. Rest was probably what he needed most now, but he had so many other things that needed to be done, that he doubted his time off would be terribly restive.  
He changed into a pair of sweat pants and an old T-shirt before finally deciding to go eat something. It felt strange not being on the bridge by this time of day, he halted just outside the dining area entrance as he noticed the place was crowded.  
Mentally he chastised himself for not checking the time before coming down, it was obviously around 1200 hours. Taking a deep breath, he marched on in and headed for his private mess, returning the greetings tossed his way.  
The Captain was barely settled into his chair when the steward on duty came in to take his order, a younger ensign he recalled as Gerald Johansson. He couldn't help but notice the man giving him the once over, almost as if to reassure himself that he was truly seeing his Captain and not an apparition.  
It wasn't long before his food arrived, he thanked Mr. Johansson and watched as he left. Archer shook his head as he turned his attention on the steaming dish before him, surprised at just how hungry he really was. He'd cleaned his plate and was letting the meal settle as his thoughts wandered. It would have been nice to have company, even if only to discuss mundane topics, it seemed strange not to.  
Heaving a sigh, he ambled back to his quarters trying to think of something to do once he got there. Porthos jumped up and joined him at his desk, sensing his master's mood, he placed his front paws on his lap then rested his head on them, giving him that soulful look that said, 'If you want to talk about it, I'm all ears.' Grinning, he patted the dog and murmured, "Thanks buddy."  
After awhile he ended up straightening up his work area, amazed at the clutter he'd managed to collect in the few drawers he had. Once he finished, he tried to find another chore he'd been putting off, but could find nothing else to do. He ended up watching the water polo matches that he hadn't had time to before, laying on his side while his head was propped on one hand. With only the illumination from the view screen to cast any light in his room he soon drifted off to sleep, the dreams which ensued did nothing to help his present state of mind as they were erotic in nature, but as much as their subject was uninvited his subconscious mind reveled in their content.  
Archer woke as he bolted upright, breathing hard and covered in sweat. He waited till his heart slowed down before getting up and stumbling into the bathroom. Not even bothering to activate the light, he stripped and climbed in the shower, letting the cool water wash some of his agitation away. He had never had a dream seem quite that real, it was disturbing too, he had thought he put that particular desire to rest as impossible and unobtainable.  
Placing his face directly under the spray before turning it off, he groped around till his hand found the towel and dried himself. Instead of returning to bed, he pulled on his robe and went and sat down at his computer terminal and proceeded to call up any games that would take his mind off the rekindled urges his dreams had provoked.  
The sound of his door chime caused him to jump, he looked at the clock and was mildy surprised to see that it read 0130 hours. He rubbed his eyes as he sat back and called out, "Enter."  
The door slid open and the slight form of his science officer cautiously entered, one brow lifting slightly as she took note of his current occupation.  
"Is everything alright Captain?"  
Giving a nod as answer, he replied, "What brings you here?"  
"I was running a systems check and noticed a marked increase in activity in the data library, mainly in the entertainment catagory. I assumed you were having trouble sleeping when I discovered the request originated from your quarters."  
Sighing, he studied her a moment before issueing his answer. "No, just the opposite. I fell asleep this afternoon and woke up a little while ago. I figured some mind challenges might lull me back to sleep."  
She walked over and glanced at the monitor then gazed back at him, "Free Cell? I'm afraid I'm not familiar with that. It appears to be a card game."  
He closed the game then shut down his terminal before standing, crossing his arms as he faced her.  
"Maybe I'll show you how it's played sometime. If that's all you were here about Sub-commander, I apologize for disturbing your routine."  
T'Pol inclined her head but paused as she started to turn. "Captain, if you are having trouble sleeping, perhaps the Doctor could perscribe a sedative to aid you."  
Archer practically growled his answer, "No, I don't need a sedative to help with what's bothering me. It's nothing that you need to worry about, so if that's all, you can go."  
Giving him a final glance, she turned to leave but stopped on the threshold and looked back over her shoulder, "Sir, if you would like someone to talk with I'm sure Commander Tucker could find the time, he has been your friend for a long time."  
"Goodnight T'Pol."  
He couldn't be sure, but he thought he heard her sigh as she closed the door. Unfortunately, her unexpected visit only fired up the very desires he'd been trying to repress. Maybe he should see the Doc about it, after all, Phlox was the one who pointedly commented that it might be his own supressed attraction to T'Pol which was causing the tension he felt. Scrub that, knowing the Doctor he might accidently mention it in the Vulcan's prescence then he'd really be in deep. Archer could just imagine how she'd take that, the last thing he needed was to have her disgusted with him.  
He removed the robe and crawled back into bed with a weary sigh, a feeling of loss weighing at his soul. Slowly, his mind drifted and he was soon asleep only to be assaulted once again by the images his subconscious threw at him. Several times he awoke in a cold sweat and his heart pounding, he was beginnig to wonder if there might be something more seriously wrong than just the enforced idleness causing his brain to come up with such vivid and troubling dreams so relentlessly.  
Archer got up and dressed in the same clothes he'd worn earlier, then left his quarters without any definite destination in mind. He wandered aimlessly for the next hour, trying to sort his chaotic thoughts into some semblence of order. Eventualy he found himself walking by T'Pol's quarters, he slowed but instantly sped by. What was he doing? Shaking his head as he wondered at his own behavior, he made his way back to his own lonely room.  
Archer undressed as soon as the door hissed shut, leaving a trail of clothing from the entry to the foot of his bed, with a final resigned sigh he crawled under the covers and fell soundly asleep.  
  
Sub-commander T'Pol was finishing the systems checks as she once again puzzled over the Captain's odd late night occupation. It just wasn't like him to be up at such an hour playing mindless games, granted he was probably bothered by not being allowed to do any ship's work, but that didn't explain why he had not been willing to discuss the problem. Even when she had suggested Commander Tucker be the one to talk to, the Captain had gotten defensive and irrate with her.  
A small beep signaled the completion of her task, the last of the evening. Shutting down her station before leaving, she sought the solace of her room. She felt tired and decided to wash up before meditating, the unease she had been unable to define earlier when she'd spoken to the Captain came back as she lit her candles. Taking a deep cleansing breath, she prepared to find the cause of these unsettling feelings. Allowing her mind to focus as she concentrated on the flame, her awareness drifted from the here and now and went back over the events of the last several days.  
Think.  
There had been only the smell of smoke and a dim light to alert her that she had somehow survided the shuttle's system failure, the sound of a low moan causing her to pull herself stiffly out of the spot she had braced herself and locate the source. Although she would never admit it to anyone else, she had suffered a sense of shock and fear when she had finally been able to make out the Captain's features. Blood covered one side of his face while his breathing was labored, coming in short hard gasps.  
As she touched his face, he had hoarsly whispered, "T'Pol?", his eyes flickering only briefly before closing as he passed out.  
Knowing shock was setting in, she quickly found the first-aid locker and had gone to work trying to keep him alive. Once she was certain he was relatively stable, she had started on trying to get the communications board working. A wave of relief washed over her as she finally got a staticty reply from Enterprise, Commander Tucker's anxious voice saying that help was on its way and that a build up of electro-magnetic particals had been distcharged in their immediate vacinity an instant before they had fallen of the sensors.  
The entire length of their ordeal had only lasted 6 hours, but it had seemed like an eternity at the time to her. All the way back to the ship, she had been unable to think of anything else but how close she had come to losing him.  
There.  
Why, she wondered. Why should she think anything like that? It wasn't logical to worry about such a thing, especially since she held no claim to him. These thoughts made no sense to her and made her question her own state of mind for a moment. Concentrating harder, she carefully analyzed them, the dawning realization of their meaning filled her with a numb shock. It was not possible, how could she miss seeing it before? A quit voice inside simply said, "Because you did not wish to do so before." With a small sigh, she opened her eyes and gazed around her room as she wondered what she should do.  
Unable to find any answers now, she retired to her bed and hoped a logical resolution could be found to her dilemma, if not, the only other option would force her to admit things that she wasn't even ready to admit to herself. Where had she faltered in her training to not be aware of this awakening emotion, T'Pol realized with regret that she must never let another living soul know of her feelings, it was not going to be an easy thing to hide from the Captain, but must to preserve his career. The last thing she wanted to be infamous for was the downfall of Joanthan Archer. Sleep slowly found her and gave her some respite from the future, but only till morning. 


	2. Resolution

Hope you're enjoying the story, the next part should be a little more interesting for those of you who want to see some more intimacy. Oh yeah, here's some lyrics I thought fit the mood. ~ Talani  
  
Mans voice:  
I watch you sleep your restless dreams,  
I can hear you breath so close to me.  
Your naked skin arouses me, I can't help touching you, pleasing you.  
My fingers caress your inner thighs, open your legs for me.  
Let me enter, let me be part of your dream.  
I'm gonna bring you up by hand, gonna make you sigh.  
Now open your altar of love.  
Womans voice:  
I'm washed upon a shore, I can feel the water tickling my pussy.  
I know this is a dream, but what I feel, feels so real.  
Someone is touching me but I don't wanna see who he is.  
His warm hands feel like flames warming up my desire.  
I'm getting absofuckinglutely horny!  
I open my eyes and see his head buried between my legs.  
I grab his hair and pull his face even closer into my crotch.  
Mans voice:  
Feel it, feel my tongue.  
I feel your wetness, it's dripping off my face.  
Hot fluids taste sweet on my lips.  
Let's Adam and Eve it baby, here's a bit of hard for your bit of soft.  
Gonna make you cum, come to me baby.  
This is real honey.  
  
High Tide, part 2  
  
Commander Tucker waited for the door to open, his arms were crossed and he tapped one foot impatiently while the occupant on the other side took his dear sweet time about it. He was just about to pound on the panel when it finally slid open.  
"Took ya long enough Capt'n, I was beginnin' ta think ya snuck off to access the bridge logs."  
Archer gave him a dire look, his voice broke as he began, "Not now Trip, believe me, it's not a good time to kid around."  
"Sorry. Anything ya wanna talk about?"  
"Maybe later, but for now I'd rather deal with it alone."  
Studying his friend's face closely, Tucker could see small stress lines around the eyes and mouth, it was obvious something had happened to distress him. Whatever it was, he could tell Jon wasn't going to share what that might be until he was ready to. Sighing, the engineer nodded, adding in a quiet tone, "Well just remember, any time ya wanna talk about it don't hesitate to call me, all right?"  
Jonathan gave him a feeble smile as he replied, "Thanks Trip, I know. This is something I need to work out for myself though, while I have the time."  
With a parting glance, Trip turned and left, as the door closed behind him he let out a quiet oath.  
"Goddamn too proud to ask for help!"  
He was worried by the odd resigned tone he'd heard in Jon's voice, it reminded him of a friend he had in high school who had called him late one night during winter recess. To this day he wasn't sure why the boy had wanted to speak with him of all people, they had talked about mundane things awhile then he'd thanked him for listening and hung up. It hadn't been till the following week that Trip had found out the boy had commited suicide, no one ever really knew what had driven him to that final desperate act.  
Grinding his jaw, Trip headed for sick bay with a determined stride, he'd be damned if he was going to sit by and watch another friend lose himself to inner demons. The most troubling thing was how sudden the change in the Captain's mood had occured, almost overnight. Tucker entered the medical facilities at a hard clip, coming to a jarring halt in the middle of the reception area and looked around for the Doctor as he called out, "Doc! I gotta talk to ya now!"  
Doctor Phlox appeared from the lab area wearing his customary smile. "Good day Commander, what seems to be troubling you?"  
"I think the Capt'n's losing it Doc."  
A puzzled expression crossed the Denobulan's face as he enquired, "Losing it? Mmm, oh yes, you are refering to a mental instability Commander?"  
"Somethin' like that, yes!"  
Motioning for Tucker to join him in his office, they were barely seated before Phlox questioned the Commander on what abnormal behavior patterns the Captain was exhibiting to alarm thim so.  
"Well Doc, I was just checking on him and he seemed real down, like there was somethin' eating at him and he refuses to talk about it. Well?"  
Rubbing his chin as he listened, the Doctor was thoughtful as he responded, "It may be he's simply suffering from post traumatic syndrome, but without running any definitive test I'm afraid I cannot give you an absolute answer Commander. But be assured, when the Captain comes for his regular check-up I'll be sure to ask him about it."  
Trip heaved a sigh of relief as he said, "Thanks Doc, I hope he'll talk to you about whatever's on his mind. I hate seein' him like this."  
Bidding the Commander farewell, Phlox waited until he'd left before activating his patient files. He scanned carefully through Captain Archer's records for any prior history of mental health problems, only becoming more and more puzzled as he continued on. It would appear that Archer had never suffered any type of mental phage, in fact, his psycological profile showed a strong and focused individual who passed every psych test at the academy with no signs of adverse effect.  
"Most curious." Phlox wondered what kind of event the man had experience recently to cause such an extreme shift in character as described by Commander Tucker, it wasn't typical for people to inexplicably lose their minds. Careful to close the record before shutting down the terminal, the Doctor left his office and went to the counter terminal in the main triage, it having access to the ships library. He began a querry on medical documents and journals that dealt with disorders of the mind and was soon lost in the case studies of various levels that a person could suffer when the normal processes of the brain were adversely affected by chemical or physical inbalance.  
  
Archer was laying sprawled across his bed with one arm draped over his face, covering his eyes. The last thing he wanted to do was to report to Dr. Phlox for an evaluation of his recovery, the man was sure to comment on his overall appearence of which he'd lost interest in maintaining. Hell with it, he wasn't required to be there at any particular time so he rolled onto his side and curled into a fetal position.  
Oblivion was short lived as his door chime buzzed, he waited to see if whoever it was would take the hint and leave. Unfortunately, they began to insistantly press the damn thing which made him sit up and roll off the bed with an angry leap.  
"Go away! I'm trying to sleep!"  
All of his anger drained as the calm even voice of T'Pol came over the speaker.  
"Captain, I need to speak with you."  
"Can't it wait?"  
"It is an important matter sir."  
He felt a wave of dread wash over him as his heart began racing, he couldn't let her come in and see him like this. Taking a deep breath, he managed to reply in a relatively calm voice, "I'm really not in any state for company right now Sub-commander, I'll give you a call when I am."  
There was a long pause of silence as he leaned against the door for support, he felt slightly shakey and his pulse continued to beat at a frantic rate.  
"Captain, are you alright?"  
He was surprised by the note of concern in her voice as well as the softened tone. Feeling a tightness in his chest, his response came out hoarse, "I'm fine, please, just leave."  
"Sir..."  
Whatever she'd been about to say was left unsaid, the com falling silent. Letting his body slide to the floor, he buried his face between his knees and covered his head with his hands. He couldn't go on like this, what was the matter with him? Never in his life had he felt so hopeless, it didn't make sense, his mind tried to grasp onto a solution. Slowly he climbed up and staggered into the bathroom, tossing his dirty clothes into a corner. A sense of relief was beginning to overtake the one of despair as he stood under the hot spray, it finally dawned on him to face this thing head on instead of letting it be in control. He had come to realise this was the only solution to it, once he knew for certain without any doubts, he'd be able get over this and move on with his life. He turned the shower off then dried himself, his movements sure and deft now that he had a course of action. Archer got dressed, absently reaching over to give Porthos a pat. Going over to the mirror, Archer made sure he looked presentable for his intended visit. He lifted his chin as he straightened his shoulder back, satisfied, he exited his quarters and marched down the hall with purpose.  
He firmly pressed the entry button and pushed through as it opened. Glancing quickly around, he locked eyes with a totally startled Vulcan.  
"I'm ready to talk now." He delivered it in a firm cool tone that gave no doubt of his real intention of coming here. He watched as T'Pol studied him carefully, trying to assess his state of mind. Taking a cautious step towards him, she quietly asked, "You said you would call when you were ready to talk Captain."  
Shrugging, he replied gently, "I changed my mind at the last minute."  
T'Pol was uncertain what his sudden appearence in her quarters meant, there was something different about him that was a far cry from the man she had seen the day before. Gone were the fine lines that had marred his features, and gone too was the sadness in his eyes, they were filled with a new light. In fact, it made her nervous the way he was looking at her, his eyes held a smoldering fire in them.  
Finding her voice, she remarked, "It is considered bad manners to enter a persons living area uninvited, is it not Captain."  
He approached her and as he got nearer she stepped back, not sure why, she knew he would never harm her. His voice was rough as he stopped, "If you'd like, I'll leave. But I would like to find out one thing before I go."  
She felt a shiver go through her as he spoke, making it hard for her to respond. He was so close she could smell his cologne mingled with a musky odor, her heart rate began to quicken as she met his eyes. With a slow deliberate motion he reached up and placed his hands firmly on her arms, his eyes never leaving hers. Using gentle pressure, he pulled her against his body, with that physical contact she became aware of his conflicting emotions as he leaned his head down.  
His lips met hers gently at first, causing an unfamiliar sensation in her. It felt like flames consuming all coherant thought as a thrill of exitement filled her. In an attempt to regain her control she tried to speak as she braced her hands on his chest, what she said only came out as a shakey whisper, "Captain, we can't.."  
His response was swift, his arms going around her in a firm embrace as he placed a passionate kiss on her moving lips. She felt a warmth in the pit of her stomach as he coaxed her lips apart with his tongue, he probed gently around as he began to run his hand down her back. No longer resisting, she felt her own desire burning within.  
Moving her hands up around his neck, she began to explore the texture of his skin and hair, fascinated by the contrast. His hands wandered in thrilling paths over her body as she felt the rising need in them both, she no longer cared that their union was forbidden, the only thing she cared about was sating the hunger that consumed her.  
Archer lifted her in his arms and carried her to the bed, a soft moan escaping her as he layed her down, "Jonathan."  
His heart leapt at the sound of his name coming from her lips, he hesitated as he gazed at her face and saw true emotion in her eyes. A pang of guilt made him offer her one last chance to stop this.  
"T'Pol, is this what you really want?"  
In answer she reached up and pulled his face down to hers and kissed him. He wasn't sure how long they continued to revel in the release of their bodies, but eventually they both tired and fell asleep in each others arms.  
The buzz from her com woke them, she sighed before answering. "Sub-commander T'Pol here."  
It was Trip, his voice filled with panick, "T'Pol, the Capt'n's missing and we can't find him anywhere! Have you seen him at all?"  
The glint of amusement that danced in her eyes wasn't evident in her calm response, "Why yes Commander, he appeared to be in perfect health the last time I saw him."  
There was a long pause before he finally said, "Uh, you're sure he was OK? No indication he might do anything stupid?"  
The corner of her mouth lifted as she replied, "I'm quite sure. As a matter of fact it would seem he has no intention of acting in an unacceptable manner Commander if his recent actions are anything to go by."  
Hesitant, Tucker's last comment sounded puzzled, "Well, uh, alright. By the way, did he say where he was heading?"  
"It was confidential."  
"Tucker out."  
Archer chuckled as he propped himself up on an elbow, "Bet he's waiting at my door when I get back."  
Reaching up to run her hand idly across his bare chest, she murmured, "Mmm, probably so. He is your friend, even when you sent him away he was determined to help you. You are very fortunate."  
Leaning over her, he gazed at the beauty before him, amazed at how she had responded to him during the night. The feelings of loneliness and dispair were gone, replaced by ones of joy and adoration, there would never be anymore doubts in his mind on how she felt about him.  
He relaxed as he lay back down, T'Pol snuggling against him as he did. "Jonathan, you never told me what you wanted."  
He smiled as he held her tigh, answering lazily, "If you haven't figured it out by now love, you never will."  
Giving him an exasperated glare for a mement, she studied him a moment before commenting, "It is not going to be easy for us to keep others from knowing about out relationship Jonathan, what will you tell them?"  
"Mmm, that it's none of their business. We shouldn't have to explain ourselves to anyone else as long as we don't let our private life interfer with our public one."  
Satisfied with his reasoning, she closed her eyes and sighed contentedly, not worried about the future if he was comfortable with this new depth of their relationship she could hardly find fault with him for forcing the issue as he had. No, far from it since it was an act of pure desperation from what she's been able to glean from his thoughts when he'd taken hold of her. Slowly her mind drifted into sleep.  
The full impact of what had transpired between them kept him from falling asleep right away, instead he lay quietly and observed the woman next to him. He was still amazed at his own audacity of barging in here and then laying a kiss on those soft warm lips, but it was well worth it to finally know with certainty that she cared about him as much as he did her even if she would never state it in those words. As he continued to gaze lovingly at her his eyelids slowly drifted shut and he was soon lost in dreams of the future, their future, and it looked bright to him.  
  
  
~ Keep the Faith ~  
  
  
OK, so? Like, don't like? Please let me know how I'm doing peeps! 


End file.
